Queen of T.P.

“We’re out of toilet paper, mom!”
“There’s no more toothpaste left, honey.”
“How come we don’t have any more paper towels?”tp

Sound familiar?

One of the joys of being a Mom is that ever so gradually–over the course of many years– you inherit a few choice titles and responsibilities as well–important monikers of distinction and honor. (Can  you hear the sarcasm?)

  1. Queen of Toilet Paper: Maintains TP inventory of all bathrooms in the home.
  2. Refrigerator Czar: Responsible for incoming and outgoing food; inside cleanliness; and defender of “I’m saving that” specialty items.
  3. Empress of the Iron: Specialist in ironing clothes that family members need in 2 minutes.
  4. Pantry Princess: Stocks and organizes all canned and dried goods.
  5. Monarch of the Mall: Knows exact GPS location of every single store and closest crownparking spot.
  6. Countess of Coordination: Organizes all important events so they fall on the exact same day
  7. Maharajah of Manners: Stand in for Emily Post or Miss Manners
  8. Tyrant of the Trash: Only person capable of identifying an overflowing trash can
  9. Dinnertime Dictator: Chooses time, location, availability, and menu of meals
  10. Duchess of Don’t: Repeats time-honored maxims: “Don’t throw the ball in the house;” “Don’t forget _____:” “Don’t give me attitude:”  “I don’t think so:”

royalDo you have any special royal titles?

Related Posts: Experienced Mom lesson #1; 20 Signs you’re an Adult; Gadget Girl; Countless Club Cards; The Refrigerator Blues:

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